– You guys asked for a cockatoo video Okay So, I would appreciate it if you didn’t look perfect in this video, show a little bit of your, don’t hurt me bad, but just like, be a real cockatoo so people don’t think that they’re chill and awesome, okay? Think you can do it? Without making me fear for my life Hey, baby I’m going to preface this with most of you that know me, know that I’m not a fan of cockatoos I find them scary, intimidating, psycho, crazy, neurotic, scary, intimidating, psycho, crazy, neurotic, scary and intimidating, and somewhat unpredictable So, to put it in perspective, I would rather get bit by a macaw than this guy When Bandit bites me, it’s to hurt me, real bad His bites suck Okay – Okay – Okay, seriously, don’t be cute in this, it’s gonna give people the wrong impression, I’m gonna be talking smack about you the whole time, and I’m gonna look like a liar if you’re good the whole time I’m going to try to get footage of when he’s at his worst, because, I’m gonna be honest, it almost happens daily, where he’s not great Even today, I went to go get him out of his aviary and he is like, no, just no interest, and it’s something where, if I push it and I were to push on his chest to get him to step onto my hand, which I wouldn’t do, I would get nailed If I were to peel his little toes up off of the perch to get him to step up when he’s not offering, I would get nailed There’s very few times where I can literally slowly peel his feet off if I absolutely have to get him to step up for whatever reason and nothing is working in my bag of tricks, and I peel his feet up, but I have to keep eye contact going on, so that I can tell at like any moment, are you gonna shred me? (bird says something) What? Are you gonna shred me, you gonna shred me, no, good And lately, he’s let me get away with it a couple of times that I’ve needed to, but that’s not me to overdo it these guys, where are you going? Where do you wanna go? Go, how about not on my notebook, ’cause it’s about you, these are the questions they asked Where is he? They can’t even see you now There My least favorite type of cockatoo species is– (bird says something) Sounded like he said not me – Do you love big boy? – I do love you, I love big boy, he’s super cute Okay, my least favorite species– – Do you love big boy? Species of cockatoo (laughs) is not the galah Galahs are my favorite type of cockatoo – Love big boy – Yeah, you’re my favorite What’s up, what do you want so bad? I don’t know what you want What are you doing? (feathers ruffle) (laughs) What are you doing here? Oh my gosh, I can’t even get through one question I feel like you wanna have a training session It’s like real bad timing He’s like why, you got nothing better to do, you’re filming a video Do you wanna show them the burrito? (pretends to bite and chew) My least favorite– (bird says something) species of cockatoo is the umbrella cockatoo I’m sorry, I know a lot of you have umbrellas out there, ’cause you comment in everything that you have one, and that obviously you still have your fingers to type with, so, I get that some of you are happily with your umbrella cockatoos, but they are my least favorite Why are they my least favorite? It was the first parrot I was introduced to besides a budgie, I had a budgie when I was very little Umbrella cockatoo was the first parrot I was introduced to on a much more personal level, and I didn’t like it The crazy thing is, I never got bit by that umbrella cockatoo or by any umbrella cockatoo,

I’ve never been bit because I wear a helmet, I hide under the couch, I don’t show up where they go, I don’t hang out where they hang out I did hold that cockatoo and everything, but– you’re so distracting Here’s the thing, here’s why I don’t like umbrella cockatoos I find them incredibly difficult to read, so their body language, I’m just like, and I think because my first experience was just scary, not scary for me, but scary for Dave, I was always worried he was gonna get attacked and we would be playing, having a good time and then all of a sudden, he’d be like, whoa, whoa, whoa, okay, stop, and I just wouldn’t see the behavior change I feel like nobody’s hearing what I’m saying because you are strutting around Sorry! Well, sorry, dude, I’m sorry, I’m sorry Okay, so, I’m gonna try– – Come here – I’m sorry Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay Hi, baby Hey, baby So, (blows) yeah, let’s keep it calm, let’s keep it calm (blows) So, those of you that are not familiar with cockatoos, he just got heightened by me accidentally dropping stuff and scaring him, and when he got all heightened and he said come here, that was him getting overly heightened to the point where I could get attacked, and so that’s why I immediately took it down a couple of notches and tried to calm him down with whispering Whispering is what I use to calm him down as quickly as possible. (blows) It doesn’t always work, but it’s my go to So, when he gets super heightened and pissed off, he says come here, but he says like come here Anyway, it’s a trigger word, so we try not to say it He gets real angry and he’ll attack, so, okay, focus Okay, so, one of the times that I held that umbrella cockatoo, named Linus, I was holding him, and Dave’s like, hey, make sure you hold his feet because when I bend over to get into his travel cage to like clean it out, he’s gonna try to attack me, so just hold on, don’t let go, and I was just like What’s gonna keep him from being like, hey, this chick is holding onto me so that I can’t attack this guy I wanna attack, so I might as well just gnaw her hand off He didn’t, but, you guys, just not cool I met a really nice, Dave says it’s like, the nicest umbrella cockatoo in Niagara Falls, and I was just frickin’ terrified, my energy is awful with umbrellas, I’m like hmm, they’re really cute from over here I can appreciate how adorable their voices are, I just think they’re neurotic in captivity, and they’re scary and intimidating and they have black eyes and they freak me out I think about behavior that he does, that I work through and how if it was an umbrella cockatoo, I would be locking myself in the bedroom or the closet and calling for help Which, by the way, (blows) sorry, he’s malting, so he’s super powdery I have to do that, even now, so, I don’t know how to explain it, and maybe you cockatoo owners out there will help me, in the comments, of explaining this, but, when any other species of bird gets upset, I feel like there’s tells, like visual tells of certain feathers raising, or streamlining, or there’s just a certain posture, like, there’s a physical body language change that tells you what that bird is feeling, and with cockatoos, I feel like it’s more of an energy shift, like, literally, energy in the room has changed, and it’s like oh, no So, I had Bandit out while I was at the dining room table working on something, and he was hanging out, and then he was on a chair and he was chilling, and there was just an energy shift, and I thought if I videotape this right now, would I be able to explain to people what changed? And I thought, I can’t, there’s nothing about his body language that is obvious enough to be like, this is what happened, this is what’s going on, do you wanna be up there, you don’t? So, then, I got up because it was gonna go down,

I could just feel it, I could feel that he was like not happy, just things changed, and, don’t get into anything ’cause then I’m gonna be screwed (laughs) Are you just like strutting in front of the camera? My stories suck because I keep getting totally distracted So, anyways, I realized that, like, things were gonna go down, I didn’t wanna be sitting in my chair totally vulnerable, so I got up and I stood in the corner of the room and looked at him, and just waited and I could just feel this energy, this tension building, building, building, so I picked up a pillow, yeah, guys, you can’t make this stuff up, cockatoo owners, you know what I’m talking about I picked up a pillow, and I held it here, and then he came at me and attacked me, he just full on, like, flew at me, so I held up the pillow and literally, I saved a picture of the pillow, I’m gonna try to find it for you, guys Just a powder cockatoo splatter on the pillow And that was, I held it up in front of my face, you guys, in front of my face, so, wham pillow, splatter cockatoo, cockatoo keeps going because angry cockatoos are, what do you call it, invincible If you guys end up seeing me get attacked in the head by my cockatoo while talking smack about cockatoos, you all are gonna be like, yeah, she deserved that, she was talking crap about the species I feel like you’re gonna get mad at me if I keep talking in my normal voice You gonna come? No, he does not Yes he does, yay I’m more comfortable with him here than any– – Do you love big boy? – I love big boy Than anywhere else in the room, because he can’t, like, fly and attack me, and he’s not likely to do it from here, so, I know it seems kinda backwards, but, he’s super not content I don’t remember what I was saying Oh yeah, the pillow thing After that, I just kinda was like Dave, and called for help, because Dave’s energy was apparently different and Bandit stepped right up for him, but I knew if I approached this guy, he would just keep coming for me And I don’t know what changed, but something did Do you like to go? But something did, something changed, something changed for him, and was I aware of it? No, because I was working and I thought we were just hanging out, having a great, you know, quality time, and we weren’t, apparently, so, you know, not in his book Also, the bird that is least likely to step up is Bandit The bird that is most likely to get emotionally charged or upset is Bandit, the bird that I am most scared of in the spring is Bandit People always say cockatoos are famous for random biting, this is him not content, by the way, he’s not wanting to do this, and I don’t know if I should push it for the video, so you guys can see what a discontent cockatoo looks like, ’cause I realize I don’t really show the bad stuff, because like I said, I’m wearing a helmet, I’m under a couch hiding somewhere in a dark little closet But, I also don’t wanna get hurt, so, how discontent are you on like a one to 10 scale? The other thing cockatoos do that I don’t feel like other birds do, necessarily, is they glare And Bandit has the worst glare It sucks, but he literally, like, does a squinty eye at me, and it is a full on glare Cockatoos are kinda notorious for diving and attacking your head, just like full on, like, bam, and then they get you and go They’re notorious for attacking feet, chasing you on the ground, being foot chasers, toe attackers, random attacks, random bites I say it with quotations, because they have a reason, we just can’t always figure out what it is Male cockatoos are notorious for being scary, hormonal, cockatoos in general are known for getting over excited, which is over heightened, over stimulated, and then totally psycho, and it goes from like party, to everybody’s losing limbs They’re known for being extremely needy, emotional, and having random fears or dislikes So, I remember Dave telling me, when he was filming a video, they got a new coffee table, and his umbrella cockatoo at the time, hated the coffee table and just screamed non-stop until they moved the coffee table, ’cause it took him a while to figure out what it was that was triggering the bird I’ve also had a girlfriend who had a goffin’s cockatoo, who hated orange for about a month, so anything that she had that was orange, out He is totally distracted by the fact that he sees

Dave and Capri outside, so, that’s the thing about Bandit, is he, yeah, he sees Dave Dave being around changes this guy He just wants Dave, he gets super obsessive He did attack me in the head the other day and I got it on film, so I’m gonna show you guys so you know that I’m not full of crap Bandit, boy! But this is his calling, he’s just so, he’s so not content anymore Obsessed about getting to Dave So, you see me cringing, it’s because this can be, like, here at this level where he’s just like oh, I wanna figure out how to get to Dave, and then it can get like, it’s your fault I can’t get to Dave, and he attacks me Do you wanna go just stare at Dave? We can put you outside in the aviary and you can just stare at him Yeah, so right now he’s not stepping up for me, he’s just looking at me I’m gonna see if I can show you Okay, do you wanna come? See, he doesn’t want to If I’m like hey, oh, somebody came in the house Do you wanna go, cute little feet, yay, good job, buddy So, I am on a brink with him, I’m on a brink that could go bad, so I’m just gonna put him away while I can, without Dave’s help, because Dave’s on a workout walk (child talking in the background) I bet, yeah, I didn’t realize it was all the birds’ bedtime Okay, well, that teaches me So, this is Bandit, super pissed off I’m not gonna say it’s random, but I really don’t know why he is pissed, I don’t know if he’s just over heightened Talking’s not helping Roll, good boy So, I just asked him to roll over and he responded really well Bad hand, good boy And I’m dropping the treats for him You might get in trouble Bandit, come to me, ooh To me, good Okay (voicemail tone) (voicemail message plays) So then he stepped up fine, but I’m going to put him away ’cause I don’t trust him so much right now But, this is why I don’t recommend cockatoos, you guys I hopefully got that on video, but, he wasn’t flying to me as much as at me, and he literally dive-bombed my head, like around here, it didn’t hurt even though I’m pretty sure that was his intention